Read if you want to.

This is Levan. And this is my response to this entire thread on SOFT.
Read it only if you want to. Don't if you are not interested.
But respond only if you have.
Because the original thread was so long and tiresome, please feel free to gloss over the bits that bore you.


It is incredibly hilarious how a thread like this can generate up to almost 10k views in two days while a link offering a free (and totally awesome) MP3 music compilation from Willy generates so much fewer views (http://soft.com.sg/forum/music-kopi-tiam/98786-singapore-si-bei-rocknroll-best-singapore-underground-music-88-08-a.html. Please take the time to download Willy’s compilation because it is good.). Either people are attracted to controversy, or there is a serious case of most frequenters here typing more than they are actually willing to listen to others.

I’d like to thank everyone for the continuous banter and battering while I was away. I also noticed a couple of posters who have popped out of nowhere only to flame me, but were conveniently missing in action when it came to actually suggesting anything constructive to anyone else in all of their prior posts. It is sad that it takes such a horde mentality in order for you to voice yourselves, perhaps because you feel comforted in jumping on the bandwagon of opportunity to attack me.

For those who know me, they know I am calculated in my actions and there is nothing impromptu about the seemingly blithe remark with regards to James. And while it may seem to be something done out of emotional discord with him, there is nothing coincidental about the action. For one thing, it certainly served to reveal the methods of mentality with which our local scene is fuelled.

But just to set things straight. I think the word ‘rockstar’ is completely and utterly retarded – just to address those who have questioned where my thinking lies. Given our limited demographic audience, being a ‘rockstar’ would probably be a hearty dosage of delusion, idiocy and whitewashed ambitions of grandeur. There are no fancy cars, no chauffeurs or palaces waiting for any of us here. I certainly have none of those, neither do I have an abundance of money nor do I believe in the ideas of such shallow pretension.

With regards to several comments addressed earlier:

To BBBOY2388, or Xiao An,
Weren’t you the guy who said you were too busy sleeping to attend Wayne Thunder’s wake? You know, the man who recorded your album? Yeah I think you’re the one. Funny how you speak only now when you felt you could. But I will refrain from revealing too much as it may detract from this thread. But I do not think someone who was unable to spend 20 minutes of his time to attend Wayne's funeral - the man who recorded your bloody album - just so you could 'sleep', as you eloquently put it, should be the one talking about doing something for the scene. Seriously, fuck off.

As for Mark Saito, he is a man who was convincing young local bands to sign contracts which prohibited them from performing at gigs NOT organized by him, and effectively seizing their opportunities to perform under his control. It was this that spurred me to contact him to ask him what the hell he was trying to do. The young bands who have been victims of this con will know fully well what I am referring to.

And to Raman, of WhatLah! Productions, you know what you were doing so I will not speak too much publicly about this.



I would like to say I am essentially flawed. I’m imperfect. I’m condescending to others when I see things not being done efficiently. I’m impatient. I’m a perfectionist, I’m blunt and am brutally honest. I also love women. I even love making out with them. But you know something? At the end of the day, my conscience is clear because I know who I am, and apart from typing on SOFT for 8 years, I have also contributed to other bands and other musicians on a multitude of times. It does somewhat sadden me that these very same bands, musicians and people I have helped have conveniently disappeared now that the fire is on me. But it won’t affect my resolution to improve the scene because I believe it is bigger than any of us as individuals. Anyone who has been part of this knows it is a thankless job, and never once have I requested any SOFTie I have helped here for any form of payment, gratitude nor credit. Never. However, this does not explain NOR validate my reaction at the recent performance. Please read on if you are still looking through this.

There are those who disagree with my methods of choice to do so, but many of those who would tear my approach apart are the very same people who are doing nothing to help it besides being armchair critics and cynics of others. At the end of the day, I have achieved a measurable amount of success as a musician. I now have it as my full time job as well. I am not afraid to ask for help when I need it, and I daresay I have never turned down anyone’s request for help from me when they have asked. To the best of my ability, I have always assisted.

I just want you to know that the recent ban was done PRIOR to the performance, not after or as a result of. And as much as James says he would allow the band to post, the first thread was signed off as the band (not me individually) and was still removed. This is contrary to his defence posted here --- http://soft.com.sg/forum/music-kopi-tiam/100597-what-happened-astroninja-thread-6.html


You have to look at the situation on the whole here, whose words and actions do match up, who responds thoroughly and who responds ambiguously over a longer stretch of time. If I was really completely and utterly opposed to James, why would I organize a chalet party which openly invited SOFT & James on November 18th, 2008 as a tribute to him? That thread is posted here - http://soft.com.sg/forum/music-kopi-tiam/82891-dont-tell-james.html for everyone to see. I paid for the booking and the BBQ as a tribute to put aside any prior disagreements with James and did not ask any form of payment nor tribute nor acknowledgement from ANYONE who attended. Not once.

And what started ticking me off was the immediate ban that followed. Without an explanation, without a word, without any warning.And if you think about it, my only retaliation to all of this has simply been a comment made at one live show.”James, your mother was good but your sister was better”

Is this the highest road to take? No.
Could it have been done more tactfully? Yes
But was it done in jest and in a light hearted manner that has been grossly overblown by oversensitive keyboard warriors. Yes.

But that being said, I grow tiresome of this debate. And James, if you are capable of thinking beyond your emotions, you will realise I am posting my final response to all of this not in defiance of your ban, but in the hopes of saving you some much needed bandwidth and ending the presumption and pondering with my response.

If you add up all of the above occasions over that period of time, after you have given your all to organize a tribute to SOFT, contributed countless posts to help local bands here, organize CD compilations for other local bands, attempted to help SOFT merge with LIME at one point (James, you might recall I did contact you with regards to this but due to LIME Closing down, was unable to follow through), and break your back to organize shows to bands that start complaining about the imperfect sound or the imperfect playing length or etc etc etc...

...And you receive an unwarranted ban, proceeded by continuous ridicule and banter at the drop of a coin by posters who jump on the bandwagon the moment the opportunity comes... how would you react?

I think I have reacted rather mildly given the circumstance. And yet, I am here today, on this very thread, still seeking out individuals who might offer ideas to the new website we are intending to launch (I have PMed a couple of them). This website that isn’t in retaliation against James, but only serves as an alternative option you might choose to explore. Because our scene deserves alternatives.An alternative that benefits not me financially or socially, But an alternative that benefits you.

Because you will be given more choice and more options to expand your music, and more sites that offer information that can help YOU.
I am not saying that all the above warrants my method of reaction at the live show.
But I am simply explaining myself and the frustrations I have faced at a result of James handling.

Now I ask you this. Have I ever painted myself as a Messiah? Or portrayed myself to be better than anyone else?
Or asked anything in return from you? Just name once. I have not, because I am not.

But pardon me if I am feeling somewhat disillusioned by the way that SOFT and the scene has chosen to attack without the full facts, merely accessing the situation on its immediate state.

For all you flamers who claim disappointment in me for my recent actions but I ask you this, a very simple question:
Take a step back and look at how some of you have chosen to react to the situation even before I have responded.
Are any of you different from the very accusations you put onto me? Have you reacted any better than I have?

The answer is 'no', and quite possibly, 'worse' - unless you consider the threat of physical violence to be acceptable.

I know I am a public figure, though I somewhat dislike the idea of it, being a natural introvert. The persona I put on stage is merely a front that has helped me on my personal career level and has worked thus far within the niche market I am attempting to fit into. But I am still learning to handle the responsibilities that come with it. That is why I am flawed, I make mistakes, and I am learning from it. But hey, at the end of the day, I’m still running the race, still pursuing my passions, and still trying to help others pursue theirs. I am more than a keyboard warrior though I am eloquent with words on the Internet. And I long for the day when our scene will flourish overseas to a thriving community of fans for everyone.

But, just like you, I am human and I have my integrity, and when that integrity is insulted (As I felt when James chose to handle the situation the way that he did), I will react like any other human being will.

Yet, if I truly felt I was better than any of you, I wouldn’t have chosen to stand before this firing squad right now. But I am.

James, if you are reading this, you know fully well that I have always applauded you efforts. I have been on SOFT for EIGHT YEARS, and supported you when SOFT was just a mere ripple in the water with only a handful of posters. I have backed you up for years and encouraged countless people to come to SOFT. Yes I have been controversial in nature in some of my posts, but I daresay I am less so than some of these flaming lips here, and far less assaulting than a poster who is physically threatening my band like ridethetiger.

If you want peace, we can make peace. You are a peace loving man and I know you can be agreeable to this. But just don’t use your platform to twist the truth to only your side of the story. That has always been my one single gripe, and the big thorn in my side, because I have always believed that as a community, we should not deliberate with our emotions, but celebrate with our intentions. And I felt that SOFT was gradually but surely being twisted towards the former.

In the end, James does run the site. But he has also created a community of sorts, an admirable one that attracts many. And yes, it is his rules, his kingdom, his playground, he is King. But we too are the inhabitants that fill it up and make it what it is. Be it an opinion that is of a minority demographic, or a widely applauded notion, we are all part of this community. We have chosen to participate in the growing of this community by our free will, because we all believe in the greater good of improving our scene. And sometimes, improving our scene requires listening to the occasional suggestion, or nagging disagreement - not simply avoiding it or refusing to acknowledge it.

And the surest sign of this is simply allowing a thread like this one - filled with threats of physical violence, insults, vulgarities and etc - to continue while threads about lesser issues are closed down, simply because they do not agree with your personal moral choices? How can one not conclude that this method of moderation is based on an emotional level and not an intellectual one?

But as it is, this is my point, and it is the point I have ALWAYS been trying to make all along. It took a calculated public comment in order for this thread to be generated, just so it could be illustrated visibly for everyone to see with their own eyes. I am just sorry it had to drag on for this long.

To those who would assault and rally, it is easy to prod and shove those who have chosen to walk the path, but I refuse to do the same back to you. And thus, I will not engage in any of the threats, insults and outright presumptions with regards to this incident from some of the posters here. Because I have better things to do than to stroke your egos with my time. This is purely for the neutrals and those who are interested in the reasoning behind it. I took this long to respond simply because I wanted to detach myself from the situation and re-access it without bombarding anyone with an emotional rant.

As it is, I am more than happy to make peace with James, simply for the sake that it hurts me to see a community that we all love in such disharmony. This was an unforeseen and unfortunate result, but I hope it better illustrates what I have been trying to say all along. "Rule, with knowledge, intellect and ideas, not presumption, emotion and concept" A philosophy that I have blundered with myself, but I am continuously striving to reach.

I truly and sincerely extend my hand of gratitude to James for all he has done and will continue to do. For he has signed, sealed and delivered his sincere contributions tirelessly.
But I will not kiss the ground he walks on just because he has begun to think that he owns the crown.

Thank you. And my apologies to only the neutrals whom I may have upset. Thank you also if you have managed to read this far into the post.

James says I should move on to 'bigger and better things' and let it go.
But to me, 'bigger and better things' is, and will always be, about improving the scene in the long run, even if it means facing the naysayers along the way.

Nil Sine Labore, as the Victorians always say
'Nothing Without Labour'

If you're a musician in a band reading this, and you're wondering whether you should take that leap of faith and follow your heart where the music takes you, don't ever give up. You will hit bumps along the way, sticks and stones will be tossed at you, but ultimately, YOU are the one in control of your own dreams and destiny. So keep your chin up always and never give in to the pressures of the system that surrounds you.

Anyone can add me up on msn at astroninjarock@hotmail.com if you are interested in contributing ideas to developing a new forum / website portal. It doesn't matter if we agree to disagree, are on the same page on in an entirely different library of thought, as long as it's an idea from a fellow musician, it will be welcomed fully.

But as for the um, flamers, don't bother. :) I don't give a fuck what you think. Your opinions do not pay for my phone bills or LEFT 4 DEAD LAN sessions. :)

Levan

P.S The new website will be up in April. And it will contain feature stories on bands,, interviews, album reviews, gig reviews, gear reviews, as well as a video central location, forums with open discussions, as well as a system which empowers the people, not the moderators.
The moderators selected will be subject to public voting if anyone raises an issue with regards to their credibility, and all subjects save for the usual issues on race, religion and politics will be permitted.

If you feel you are able to contribute as a writer, designer, photographer, musician, anything at all, or even just raw ideas you'd like to see implemented..
Add me up on MSN!
All your opinions are valued, because this site is for you, and your voice should be heard.

P.S. You gotta admit though
One comment made
And tons of free publicity.
Kinda love it :)
Ladies and gentleman, and those who have fueled close to 30k hits in one week on SOFT...
Welcome to Internet Marketing 101 :) Peace! :)

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